Kiddushin, Daf Mem Gimmel, Part 6
Introduction
Today s section discusses who has a right to betroth a young girl and who has a right to accept her divorce if she is already married.
האיש מקדש את בתו תנן התם נערה המאורסה היא ואביה מקבלין את גיטה אמר רבי יהודה אין שתי ידים זוכות כאחד אלא אביה מקבל את גיטה וכל שאין יכולה לשמור את גיטה אין יכולה להתגרש
A man may give his daughter [etc.]. We learned elsewhere: A na’arah, who has been betrothed, she or her father can accept her get.
R. Yehudah said: Two hands cannot have the same rights. Rather [only] her father can accept her divorce. And anyone who cannot take care of her get cannot be divorced.
The Talmud quotes a mishnah from Gittin. According to the first opinion, a betrothed girl who is between 12 and 12.5 years of age, a na arah, can either receive her own get or her father can. R. Yehudah holds that only her father can receive the get. And if she is so young (or mentally incapacitated) that she cannot hold on to her get, then she cannot be divorced.
אמר ר"ל כמחלוקת לגירושין כך מחלוקת לקידושין
ורבי יוחנן אמר מחלוקת לגירושין אבל לקידושין דברי הכל אביה ולא היא
Resh Lakish said: Just as they differ in respect to divorce, so they differ in respect to betrothal. R. Yohanan said: They differ in respect to divorce [only], but as for betrothal, all agree that only her father [can accept kiddushin] but not she herself.
According to Resh Lakish, the same dispute that occurs with regard to divorce all occurs in betrothal. The first opinion would hold that a na arah can betroth herself or her father can betroth her, while R. Yehudah would hold that only the father can.
R. Yohanan would hold that when it comes to kiddushin, only the father can betroth the na arah.
ואמר ר’ יוסי בר’ חנינא מאי טעמיה דר’ יוחנן אליבא דרבנן גירושין דמכנסת עצמה לרשות אביה בין היא ובין אביה קידושין דמפקעת עצמה מרשות אביה אביה ולא היא
R. Yose son of R. Hanina said: What is R. Yohanan s reason according to the rabbis? Divorce, since she brings herself back into her father s domain, both she and her father [can accept it]. But kiddushin, which takes her out of her father s domain, only her father [can accept it], but not she herself.
Why does R. Yohanan say that when it comes to divorce, either she or her father can accept the get, whereas when it comes to betrothal, since it removes her from her father s domain, only he can accept it, not her? The issue hinges on whether the act brings her into her father s domain (either can accept) or takes her out of her father s domain (only the girl can accept).
והרי מאמר דמפקעת עצמה מרשות אביה ותנן קטנה מן האירוסין אין עושים בה מאמר אלא מדעת אביה והנערה בין מדעת עצמה בין מדעת אביה (מה שאין כן בקידושין)
But what of ma amar, which takes her out of her father s domain, yet we learned: A minor [widowed] from betrothal, cannot perform ma amar except with her father’s consent; whereas in the case of a na’arah, either her own consent or her father’s consent!
Above we said that for a na arah, only her father can betroth her since kiddushin takes her out of his domain. But this mishnah says that when it comes to ma amar betrothal for a girl awaiting levirate marriage, either she or her father can accept it, despite the fact that this also takes her out of her father s domain. This is a difficulty on R. Yohanan.
אלא אי איתמר הכי איתמר אמר רבי יוסי בר’ חנינא מאי טעמיה דר’ יוחנן אליבא דרבנן קידושין דמדעתה אביה ולא היא גירושין דבעל כרחה בין היא בין אביה
Rather if it was stated, it was thus stated: R. Yose son of R. Hanina said: What is R. Yohanan s reasoning according to the Rabbis? Kiddushin, which requires her consent, [only] her father [can accept it] but not she; divorce, which is even against her will, either she or her father [can accept it].
The Talmud now rewrites R. Yose son of R. Hanina s explanation of R. Yohanan. Since betrothal requires a woman s consent, and she is too young to give it, only her father can accept it. But when it comes to divorce, which does not require her consent, it does not really matter who accepts the document. Even she can accept it.
הרי מאמר דמדעתה וקתני בין היא ובין אביה
התם במאמר דבעל כרחה ורבי היא דתניא העושה מאמר ביבמתו שלא מדעתה רבי אומר קנה וחכ"א לא קנה
But ma amar [too] requires her consent, yet it is taught, either she or her father [can accept it]?
There the reference is to ma amar [done] against her will, and it is in agreement with Rabbi. For it was taught: One who performs ma amar with his yevamah without her consent, Rabbi ruled: He acquires her; but the Sages say: He does not.
This is the same difficulty as above. A na arah (12-12.5 year old girl) can accept ma amar (levirate betrothal), even though it requires her consent. Thus, a na arah can accept something even if she is not legally able to consent.
The Talmud resolves that this opinion accords with Rabbi who said that unlike betrothal, ma amar can be performed against a girl s consent. [The main effect of ma amar is that she will not be able to have yibbum, levirate marriage, with any of the other brothers]. However, the other sages hold that like kiddushin, ma amar requires consent.