Kiddushin, Daf Mem Daled, Part 6

 

Introduction

Theoretically a minor girl cannot accept her own betrothal, only her father can makes such an arrangement. Today s sugya begins a discussion about what happens if she does accept her own betrothal without his knowledge. To leave this marriage does she require a full divorce?

 

איתמר קטנה שנתקדשה שלא לדעת אביה אמר שמואל צריכה גט וצריכה מיאון

אמר קרנא דברים בגו אם גט למה מיאון אם מיאון למה גט

אמרו ליה הא מר עוקבא ובי דיניה בכפרי אפכוה שדרוה לקמיה דרב

אמר להו האלהים צריכה גט וצריכה מיאון וחס ליה לזרעיה דאבא בר אבא דנימא הכי

 

It has been stated: A minor [ketanah] who was betrothed without her father’s knowledge, Shmuel said: She requires both a get and mi’un.

Karna said: This is inherently difficult: if [she needs] a get, why mi un, and if mi un, why a get?

They said to him: But didn t Mar Ukba and his court at Kafri reverse it and sent it to Rav. He said to them, By God! She requires both a get and mi’un, yet Heaven should have mercy that the seed of Abba b. Abba should say such a thing.

 

Shmuel says that this girl requires a get, a regular divorce document. She also must perform mi un which means refusal and is the way of annulling a marriage whose validity is only rabbinic and not biblical. Mi un usually refers to a case where a girl without a father was married off by her mother or brother. From the Torah only the father has the right to marry her off. The rabbis gave the mother or brother such a power, but added that when the girl becomes of majority age, she can refuse the marriage.

Karna (not the Great Karnak, but close) points out that Shmuel contradicts himself. If the marriage was valid, than she should need a get, not mi un. And if the marriage is valid only rabbinically, then why should she need a get.

The rabbis for some reason reverse the opinions and send the discussion to Rav. Rav rules like Shmuel did originally, and then notes that he could not believe that Shmuel would say like Karna. Rav too thinks she need a get and mi un.

 

וטעמא מאי אמר רב אחא בריה דרב איקא צריכה גט שמא נתרצה האב בקידושין

צריכה מיאון שמא לא נתרצה האב בקידושין ויאמרו אין קידושין תופסין באחותה

 

And what is the reason? R. Abba son of R. Ika: She needs a divorce, in case her father consented to the kiddushin, while she needs mi un, in case her father did not consent to the kiddushin, and it is said that the kiddushin with her sister [by the same man] is invalid.

 

R. Abba son of R. Ika explains why she needs both. If the father consented to the marriage, then it would be valid and to leave the marriage she would need a divorce.

If the father does not consent, then really the marriage is not valid. But since she received a get, we would think that she is a divorcee and therefore this man cannot marry her sister (a man may not marry his divorcees sister). To signify that the marriage was not necessarily valid, and therefore if he tries to marry her sister the kiddushin are valid, we also force them to perform mi un. If he betroths the sister and then wishes to terminate the marriage, he would have to divorce her as well.

 

אמר ר"נ והוא ששדכו

 

R. Nahman said: This refers to a case where they arranged the match.

 

Shmuel s rule is valid only if they already arranged the match (a shidukh). In such a case, we can assume that the father would have wanted the marriage. But if there was no such arrangement we do not need to assume that he would have been okay with the marriage.

 

עולא אמר אפילו מיאון אינה צריכה

אע"ג דשידכו

מאן דמתני הא לא מתני הא

 

Ulla said: She does not even require mi’un.

[What!] even though there was an arrangement?

He who taught this did not learn the other.

 

Ulla totally disagrees with Shmuel such a girl does not even need mi un. All the more so, she does not require a get.

But, the Talmud notes, this is true only if there were no prior arrangements. If there were, then she would need a get and mi un.

 

איכא דאמרי אמר עולא קטנה שנתקדשה שלא לדעת אביה אפילו מיאון אינה צריכה

 

Others say: Ulla said: If a minor [ketanah] is betrothed without her father’s knowledge, she does not even require mi’un.

 

According to this version, even if there were arrangements, she still does not require mi un.

מתיב רב כהנא וכולן אם מתו או מיאנו או נתגרשו או שנמצאו איילונית צרותיהן מותרות

דקדשה מאן אילימא דקדשה אביה במיאון סגי לה גט מעליא בעיא

אלא לאו דקדשה איהי נפשה וקתני דבעיא מיאון

 

R. Kahana objected: And if [any among] all these died, protested, were divorced, or found to be barren, their rival-wives are permitted [to the yabam].

Now, who betrothed her? If we say that her father betrothed her? Is then mi un sufficient? She requires a proper get!

Hence it must surely mean that she betrothed herself, yet it is taught that she requires mi’un!

 

R. Kahana cites a mishnah from Yevamot. A man is married to two women and dies and both become liable for yibbum (levirate marriage) with the yavam. If the yavam is prohibited from marrying one of them (for instance she is his daughter), then the rival wife is also exempt (this is the subject of the first chapter of Yevamot). However, if the marriage with the forbidden wife was terminated, then the rival wife can perform yibbum.

One of the ways of terminating this marriage is mi un, refusal. Who, the Talmud asks, gets to leave a marriage with refusal it must be a minor who was married without the consent of her father.

 

הוא מותיב לה והוא מפרק לה כגון שנעשה לה מעשה יתומה בחיי האב

He raised the objection and he [himself] answered it: For instance she had been treated as an orphan during her father’s lifetime.

 

R. Kahana resolves the difficulty by saying it refers only to a case where the girl was treated like an orphan during her father s lifetime. He married her off as a minor and then she was divorced or widowed. Her father no longer has any authority over her. If she now, while still a minor, accepts marriage without her father s consent, she can leave that marriage without a get and with only mi un. But if she was married without his consent for her first marriage, the marriage, according to Ulla, has no validity.