Kiddushin, Daf Lammed Aleph, Part 1

 

Introduction

This week s daf continues to deal with honoring one s parents.

 

תני תנא קמיה דרב נחמן בזמן שאדם מצער את אביו ואת אמו אמר הקב"ה יפה עשיתי שלא דרתי ביניהם שאלמלי דרתי ביניהם ציערוני

 

A tanna recited before R. Nahman: When a man troubles his father and his mother, the Holy One, blessed be He, says: I did right in not dwelling among them, for had I dwelt among them, they would have troubled Me.

 

This one hits home hard. Definitely written by a parent well-versed in eliciting guilt.

 

אמר ר’ יצחק כל העובר עבירה בסתר כאילו דוחק רגלי שכינה שנאמר (ישעיהו סו, א) כה אמר ה’ השמים כסאי והארץ הדום רגלי

אמר רבי יהושע בן לוי אסור לאדם שיהלך ארבע אמות בקומה זקופה שנא’ (ישעיהו ו, ג) מלא כל הארץ כבודו רב הונא בריה דרב יהושע לא מסגי ארבע אמות בגילוי הראש אמר שכינה למעלה מראשי

 

R. Yitzchak said: One who transgresses in secret it is as though he pushed away the feet of the Shekhinah for it is written: Thus says the Lord, The heaven is my throne, and the earth is my footstool (Isaiah 66:1).

R. Yehoshua ben Levi said: One may not walk four cubits with an upright posture, for it is said, The whole earth is full of His glory (Isaiah 6:3).

R. Huna son of R. Joshua would not walk four cubits bareheaded, saying: The Shekhinah is above my head.

 

Since the previous source imagined God dwelling among human beings, these sources continue to discuss the ramifications of God actually living on earth. The first ramification is that God is everywhere one cannot hide from God. Sinning in secret is akin to making the theological statement that God is not in a certain place. I should note that there are sources that contradict this and seem to say that sinning in secret is preferable to sinning in public.

The second two statements deal with the proper posture and clothing to acknowledge that God is only slightly above one s head. This last statement is one of the sources used to prove that Jews must keep their heads covered.

 

שאל בן אלמנה אחת את ר’ אליעזר אבא אומר השקיני מים ואימא אומרת השקיני מים איזה מהם קודם אמר ליה הנח כבוד אמך ועשה כבוד אביך שאתה ואמך חייבים בכבוד אביך

בא לפני רבי יהושע אמר לו כך

אמר לו רבי נתגרשה מהו אמר ליה מבין ריסי עיניך ניכר שבן אלמנה אתה הטל להן מים בספל וקעקע להן כתרנגולין

 

A widow’s son asked R. Eliezer: If my father says, Give me a drink of water, and my mother says Give me a drink of water, which takes precedence?

He said to him: Leave aside your mother s honor and fulfill the honor due your father, for both you and your mother are obligated to honor your father.

Then he went before R. Joshua, who answered him the same.

He said to him, My master? What if she is divorced?

He replied, From your eyelids it is obvious that you are a widow’s son. Pour some water for them into a basin, and screech for them like chickens!

 

My wife (and mother, and pretty much every other woman I know) would not be too pleased with the rule from this source.

But in the end, R. Joshua does rule that if the woman is divorced then the son owes them equal honor. If they re both hollering for water, then all one can do is put the water on the floor screech at them as one does to chickens!

 

דרש עולא רבה אפיתחא דבי נשיאה מאי דכתיב (תהלים קלח, ד) יודוך ה’ כל מלכי ארץ כי שמעו אמרי פיך מאמר פיך לא נאמר אלא אמרי פיך בשעה שאמר הקב"ה (שמות כ, ב) אנכי ולא יהיה לך אמרו אומות העולם לכבוד עצמו הוא דורש כיון שאמר (שמות כ, יא) כבד את אביך ואת אמך חזרו והודו למאמרות הראשונות

רבא אמר מהכא (תהלים קיט, קס) ראש דברך אמת ראש דברך ולא סוף דברך אלא מסוף דברך ניכר שראש דברך אמת

 

Ulla Rabbah taught at the entrance to the Patriarch s house: What is meant by, All the kings of the earth shall give You thanks, O Lord, For they have heard the words of Your mouth? (Psalms 138:4): Not the word of Your mouth, but the words of Your mouth is said.

When the Holy One, blessed be He, proclaimed, I am [the Lord Your God] and You shall have none [other Gods before me], the nations of the world said: He teaches merely for His own honor. As soon as He declared: Honor your father and your mother, they recanted and admitted [the justice of] the first command [too].

Rava said, [This may be deduced] from the following: The beginning of Your word is true (Psalms 119:160): the beginning of Your word, but not the end!

Rather from the end of Your word it may be seen that the beginning of Your word is true.

 

The fact that God demands that children honor their parents is proof that God is not interested only in God s own honor.